How do we get involved in unloving relationships? Relationships where the other does not see our Love essence, nor do we see the Love essence in the other; we see one another through eyes that evaluate - will I be able to have power over you, will you control me, will you take care of me, will let me take care of you, will you hold up your end of the bargain so we can be successful in the world, will you join me in making a life that will bring the happiness I do not now experience, will you be my rescuer, will you let me persecute you, will you let me fix you, will you make children with me … What is usually missing is a willingness to see the other for who they truly are, the pure Spirit of God wanting to give and receive peace. Why this rare instance?

Ultimately, true worthiness, encountered when one meets one's Self, is the loving relationship necessary to build a loving relationship with another. We fall away from our true Self again and again. The ego mind stores the function of "forgetfulness;" just as the mind of Holy Spirit stores the function of "remembering." We have a choice between the two. The memory banks of the ego mind store only the past. What happens is that when we choose this ego mind, we relive the past over and over again. We can emerge from the Oneness and experience our true Self only in this present moment because It only happens in the present moment. Our right mind, if it operated in the past or future, would not be our right mind because what makes our right mind "right" or in alignment with Holy Spirit is its state of awareness. In awareness there is no past or future, only now. We can conjure up the past or imagine the future, but we cannot be aware in the past or future. We can only be aware now. Do you think God keeps a watch or a calendar to keep track of time? Ego keeps track of time. Awareness tracks now.

To come into Love, we must come into awareness. Love is not in the past or future, it is available to us now, if we choose. We are never out of luck or out of time. We are never too late. We are never out of new moments in which we may choose again. Love is generous. Unworthiness arises out of past memories or future concerns. We feel guilt about the past or worried about how we will be in the future. Being we have no control over either, the ego thought system convinces us we are unworthy. The ego is all about control. On the other hand, this moment cannot be guilt-ridden over the past or made to feel incompetent about the future. If we feel either, we are not in this moment. Awareness carries with it complete acceptance of what is, and only Love is.

In special relationships, little time is spent in the present moment, in the awareness of Love's presence. There is much time devoted to reviewing the past day, week, month, year, decade or planning for that evening, next day, next week, next year, ten years from now … This lock in time keeps us in unworthiness because it keeps us out of now where awareness of Love rests, and worthiness only rests in Love - Oneness.

A loving relationship can only be experienced now. But you say, we live in a world of time, I must pay attention to the time to function. Go ahead, look at the clock, make your appointments, just choose to be present when doing so. In being present, you will be in the flow of Love. In being in the flow of Love, you will experience your worthiness. In experiencing worthiness you will see the worth in another - and maybe, he or she will see it too.

We cannot really choose an unloving partner or be an unloving partner ourselves, like we have been branded that way and there is no way out. We can choose to not live in this moment, in the Divine flow. Our partner can choose to not live in this moment, where Love breathes. The only way to be a loving partner is to be here now resting in Love. The only way to find a loving partner is to be here now resting in Love. Love finds Itself; you do not have to go looking for it. That which is not Love will find you too in its search for Its Self in You. Do not succumb to its lower nature. Instead, follow Love and let it follow you. Trust in your own ability to find a loving partner and you have placed your trust in indecision and a mockery of Love.

How does one live in the moment? Trick question of the ego! We cannot plan out how to live in the moment! The more moments one experiences, the more one is exposed to Love, graced by your true nature. In comparison to the scraps the ego thought system throws at you … there is no comparison. You will choose Love more consistently as you experience peace of mind more consistently. Practice. When we choose Love, we can then offer this Love to others and in this sharing the moment is complete. Now, will you be Love?

Copyright © 2007 Mary Gerard Lenihan